Groundhog

February 2nd 2018

Today, like every other day, is Groundhog Day. I don’t really know the full history behind the American holiday of ‘Groundhog Day’, but I understand that it in some, weird Game of Thrones “Winter is Coming” way ‘predicts’ how long is left until Spring. Or something. I thought that, you know, the earth’s orbit and vernal equinoxes and stuff decided when Spring began, but no, apparently it’s a ferret looking thing that’s just woken up from hibernation.

So no, I don’t really understand what the Groundhog Day holiday is all about. But I’ve seen the film. And I watched it again tonight. It’s one of the rare occurrences where the film title has transcended itself and entered common parlance. In the film of the same name, Bill Murray’s character keeps waking up and living through the same day — which happens to be groundhog day — over and over again.

Now, the phrase ‘groundhog day’ is used similarly to ‘deja vu’ to mean that it feels like something is happening over and over again, or has happened before (although in the case of ‘Deja Vu’ the Denzel Washington film came after the French phrase).

Recently, I’ve been feeling a bit of that Groundhog Day syndrome. It just feels like I’ve been living the same day over and over again. I wake up, I go to work, I come home, I eat food, I watch TV, I put minimal effort into writing these daily blog posts, I go to sleep, I wake up, I go to work, I come home, etc.

It’s been pointed out to me that these daily blog posts are not as entertaining as they once were, and that’s probably fair. My life is not as entertaining as it once was. These posts were great when I was travelling around Europe for three months, sharing photos and stories from my trip.

Now, I just… I wake up, I go to work, I come home, etc.

And yes, I know… so does every other adult in the world. It’s not just me that feels like they’re living the same day over and over again. I’m sure lots of people feel like that. But I’m the only one who has to write this blog every day.

And yes, I have to. I just don’t really want to anymore. This blog started over three years ago because I wanted to document every day of my life. I wanted to journalise my progress through my twenties. I wanted to be able to look back, in fifty years time, and see what I was thinking, or feeling, or doing.

A side effect of writing this blog has been people reading this blog, and when I started to become aware of that I started trying to ensure that the blogs remained entertaining in tone, if not in topic. Reading a story about what I did at work, or what I cooked myself for dinner is not in and of itself very exciting, but I try to write it in a way that makes it enjoyable.

I think for the most part I used to be successful at that. But then the daily topics began to get less diverse as my life began to get less diverse, and the quality of these blogs suffered. I wasn’t enthused by what I was writing, because I’m not enthused by the life that I’m living. It’s all just very groundhog day at the moment.

I’m living the same day over and the over, but at the end of each one I have to sit down and create a piece of writing that tells a story, is entertaining, and is unique to all of the previous 1129 days worth of blog posts.

Until tomorrow, there’s only so many ways that I can say it.

Jacn

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