November 9th 2017
Today we argued over whose turn it was to cook dinner so Alice went and got a McDonald’s instead. We have this agreement in our house that who(m?)ever gets home first has to get dinner started. Except today I got home like thirty seconds before Alice did and I didn’t think that that was a significant enough time to warrant me having to cook dinner, and I cooked dinner yesterday, so I protested for a bit.
Usually my protests end in me caving in after a minute of her bugging me. As much as I hate to admit it, if it’s the middle of the night and she asks me to go down stairs and get her a glass of water, then I’ll go and do it. It’s just easier than the aggro, you know?
Today though I felt like being stubborn, so I protested and protested, and said that I refused to cook, and I refused to even help her cook. It was a dick move from me really, because as per our house ‘rules’, I was first home so I should’ve started dinner. I just didn’t want to.
Anyway, I stayed firm in my protest, and after nine years together I’ve learnt that she’s just as stubborn as I am, so neither of us was going to cave in and put the pasta on (yeah, we were protesting over pasta, which basically only requires putting the kettle on).
Usually in these situations I’ll cave first because she knows how to play me. If I say I don’t want to hold the basket when we go shopping, then she’ll put the basket on the floor and walk away. A childish ploy, but an effective one. She’s good at it, I’ll give her that.
She knows that I’d much rather cave in than deal with the aggro.
Today though, was my day.
She caved first. I went upstairs, leaving her on the sofa. I heard the door open and slam shut, and that could mean only one thing:
A Chicken Legend meal from McDonald’s.
What a girl. What a girl. I’ll forgive her for forgetting to ask for it without lettuce because she did remember to ask for bacon. And she got the only soft drink option that I like: summer fruits Oasis.
I wouldn’t normally condone McDonald’s on a school night, but these were very particular circumstances, and I think, overall, that in this situation everyone is a winner.
Until tomorrow, she’s a chicken legend.