Inclusive

September 24th 2017

Today we had a proper day of all-inclusive. I don’t usually like to be one of those people who just gets down to the pool at 9am and stays there until the sun goes down, but I got really invested in the book I was reading and we kind of just stayed there the whole day. With only occasional laps of the pool to cool off from the Rhodes sun, and  less occasional trips to the bar to stock up on Pina Coladas. 

By this point, I’m 100% sure that all of the liquid in my body has been replaced with Pina Colada. 

That’s the benefit of all-inclusive I guess. The guy behind the bar, and I promise he’s called Stavros, has become so accustomed to me ordering two Pina coladas every time I see him that he basically refuses to serve me anything else. It might just be the language barrier, but I ordered a coffee and a coke earlier and he just gave me two Pina coladas instead. Of course, I accepted them graciously and walked away without mentioning it. 

This evening, however, we went out for drinks to get a change of scenery and had quite the opposite experience. In Rhodes, bar and restaurant owners do that thing where they hassle you and usher you in with “welcome welcome, food and drink?” And try to get you into their bar. That’s kind of annoying, but we weren’t too fussy about where we wanted to go in Rhodes old town, because they’re all much the same and they all serve what we were after: a boot beer. 

I ordered a small boot beer and Alice ordered a small cocktail. What we got, was a large boot beer and a large cocktail. 


The drinks menu didn’t have prices, just pictures. Immediately that seemed odd but we just went along with it and were encouraged by the size of our drinks. That is, until we came to pay for them and saw the prices. 

€23 for the two? Fuck off mate. 

Clearly, we’d been scammed. He’d given us priceless menus, then given us not-what-we’d-ordered, and expected us to accept it. We didn’t. Perhaps his business model doesn’t account for the fact that an extra litre of alcohol makes you more feisty. 

My feistiness got us €3 and down to an even note. It could’ve been better… Usuaully, I like to think of myself as a polite and courteous gentlemen, but I didn’t even feel bad when I walked out of the bar without saying thank you to anyone. 

That’ll show them. 

It’s a shame because it’s put a downer on an otherwise enjoyable day.

Until tomorrow, stuck to the free stuff. 

Jacn

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